In a past column, I wrote about concerns about school safety and the simple fact that one of most-requested measures – metal detectors – is a fundamentally flawed solution. The same is true for some of the high-tech wizardry you’ve seen on the news, or calls to arm teachers.
(Why do I think arming teachers is a flawed idea? The same reason guards at the Hendricks County Jail don’t carry firearms. The potential for a gun to wind up in the wrong hands outweighs any deterrent value. Students aren’t stupid and “secure” storage isn’t foolproof. You can disagree with me, but you won’t convince me otherwise.)
I’ve sat in countless workshops and lectures from some of the world’s leading school safety experts and read detailed analyses of past school shootings. Everything I’ve seen has convinced me that the best way to keep kids safe has nothing to do with weapons, or systems, or gimmicks.
What it does involve is getting to know kids. Really know them. In nearly every incidence of violence in schools worldwide, there were warning signs that were missed. In the days after mass shootings, we hear why nobody was surprised a particular student (or often, ex-student) committed the deadly act. We get a picture of someone who lived on the fringes. If I asked you to think of a long-ago classmate who seemed like a potential violent actor, I suspect a name or two would spring to mind.
Today’s teachers, counselors, and administrators work very diligently to get to know kids and to pay attention to what’s happening with them, but they can only do so much. If you’re teaching six math classes, you’re dealing with 150 or more kids every day. No matter how perceptive and observant you may be, the odds are against you. We can’t count on school employees to do it all.
We need you, too. Get to know your neighbors’ kids. Teenagers may not be talkative, but if you treat them like adults, you’ll quickly gain their trust and respect. They’ll recognize they can talk to you if there’s a problem like a classmate making threats. (Friendly advice? Asking what their favorite class is will tell 100 percent of teens you lack a genuine interest in them. Instead, ask for their opinion on some major trend or Caitlin Clark and listen attentively. Far too few adults treat them that way.)
You need to really get to know your neighbors, too. Your community’s adults don’t need to become BFFs, but they need to be able to recognize and look out for each other. If you and the neighbors on either side are uneasy about the kid across the street, it may be with good reason. Those news stories that talk about how everyone suspected the school shooter was up to no good, but nobody spoke up? That’s what happens when neighbors live in silos.
What puts parents at ease? For us, it was the decision to put full-time police offices with specialized SRO (school resource office) training. Yes, they’re going to provide the first response if something happens, but more important, they’re getting to know the students and vice versa. Students who feel known and respected by adults are far less likely to fall prey to the kind of thinking that creates headlines.